An Average Movie-Goer’s Review
Spoilers! If you don’t want spoilers – check out the Spoiler-Free post
I love horror movies and if I’m going to watch them anyway, why not write an entertaining/funny review from the POV of an average movie-goer and not a professional critic.
Today we’re looking at the 2022 Hulu original and remake Hellraiser
After Riley comes into the possession of a puzzle box, she is stalked by supernatural beings called Cenobites that require violent sacrifices in order to grant a wish.
Is it Scary?
Hellraiser is gory and the cenobite/monster design is creepy and disturbing in a good horror way. The movie might not have a lot of jump scares, maybe one or two real ones, but the cenobites might just terrify you if you’re not used to it.
In the end you’ll be unsettled to the point of horror and you might catch yourself sleeping with the lights for at least one night. Also if anyone gives you a puzzle box as a gift, you might find yourself involuntarily throwing it back at their face.
Detailed Plot:
The film opens in Belgrade, Serbia where we meet Serena Menaker (played by Hiam Abbass) making an exchange in a shady alleyway with an unknown man. After giving him a briefcase full of cash, he gives her a wooden box and we learn she works for a “Mr. Voight”.
We cut to the Berkshires in Massachusetts, at a large mansion hosting a fancy sex party. One of the sex workers Joey (played by Kit Clarke) heads to the bar and meets Serena who directs him to a room where he can meet with Voight.
Joey enters the room which looks like a display room from a museum with several artifacts displayed on pillars with underlighting. In the center of the room he sees a puzzle box and for some reason he immediately touches it.
Voight (played by Goran Visnjic) walks in and is completely fine with a stranger touching his objects. He then tells Joey to try to solve it as it will net him a prize… importantly he says the prize is for himself, not Joey.
Joey solves the puzzle pretty quickly, almost like he’s seen it before; barely even thinks about it before turning some pieces and locking them in place. Pushing in one of the pieces causes a small blade to protrude and rip through Joey’s hand while Voight looks on unsurprised.
Joey cries out in pain, drops the puzzle, and tries to leave the room but Voight pushes a switch on the wall causing a gate to fall on the door. Joey yells out for help but his vision starts to blur as we see a section of the wall open.
A hook flies out and pierces Joey’s leg as Voight picks up the puzzle box and places it on a stand. Voight kneels and prays to something while more hooks rip into a screaming Joey and lift him into the air.
Title card!
We cut to six years later to our main characters Riley (played by Odessa A’zion) and Trevor (Drew Starkey) having sex. Trevor ruins the mood by saying he loves her not realizing that this is neither the time nor the place for it. As they leave the room and Trevor apologizes, the two realize others in the apartment have heard their sexcapades.
Riley introduces Chris Evans-Lite Trevor to her brother Matt (played by Brandon Flynn), his boyfriend Colin (played by Adam Faison), and their roommate Nora (Aoife Hinds).
After Trevor leaves we learn an awful lot about Riley/Matt very quickly and it got pretty close to the ridiculous Lantern’s Lane exposition dump levels (Read our Lantern’s Lane review here).
We learn Riley is in rehab and has been sober for 6 months. She lives with Matt who has been covering the rent for her for the last few months. Matt is the serious sibling with his shit together and this means he’s totally going to die and serve as motivation (I’ve seen Big Hero 6).
In the end, Riley agrees to not see Trevor anymore as Matt thinks he’s a bad influence. Cut to Riley with Trevor in his apartment the next day. Riley expresses that she needs a job and forces Trevor to tell her about an idea he has for a job despite him believing Matt would disapprove.
Apparently, Trevor’s job requires him to drop stuff off at warehouses and he recalls seeing a completely abandoned warehouse that contained pricey items. Last he saw, there was one shipment left and nobody has been in and out of the warehouse in some time. The two agree to enter the warehouse (Trevor remembers the key code) and rob it.
That night at the warehouse the two drink before heading in. Inside, they quickly find the shipping container because it’s literally right in front of the warehouse gate, and inside, they find a single safe which I feel should be a big red flag. After some time they break it open and find some cash… just kidding, this is Hellraiser so they find the puzzle box.
Though Trevor is disappointed, Riley seems entranced by the puzzle box and takes it. Later at home, Matt is pissed as Riley arrives drunk leading to an argument where Matt kicks Riley out of the house. As she leaves Colin tries to convince her to stay but she refuses.
Throwing her things into her car, Riley finds a tin of pills but decides to throw them on the ground. This is weird since I assumed her character arc would be fighting off addiction but if she’s already not taking the drugs- oh, she picks up three and swallows them…
Grabbing the puzzle box, Riley heads to the park where she solves the first configuration of the puzzle which feels easier than it should be. This causes a blade to poke out but luckily it doesn’t cut her. The drugs start to kick in and Riley thinks she sees someone in the distance but they’re gone when she looks again.
A voice then proclaims the blade was meant for her and two Cenobites (extra-dimensional beings/monsters/demons) appear. The first is The Gasp and the second is The Priest (aka Pinhead) who is now holding the box and says that if Riley won’t go with them, she has to bring them another.
A bloody hole appears in Riley’s chest and chains shoot out as we cut to Matt sleeping in bed. Chains descend from the ceiling and pierce his body but this turns out to be a nightmare.
Colin recommends Matt call Riley but Matt decides to just go out and look for her, finding her passed out on the merry-go-round in the park. Running over to her, he grabs the box and it pierces his hand. Honestly, he didn’t need to grab the box that hard. Riley wakes up and Matt heads into the park bathroom to rinse off his hand.
Meanwhile, Matt’s blood on the puzzle box seeps in and starts to change on its own which is probably not good news. Inside the bathroom, Matt sees the walls start to shift and we cut to outside as we hear his screams. Riley runs inside the bathroom and finds it completely empty.
A short time later the police are investigating the disappearance and Riley tells Colin and Nora what happened Unfortunately, she was too high to remember much. After a heated exchange with Colin, Riley leaves and visits Trevor where they proceed to have sex. During the act, Riley sees another cenobite, The Chatterer, and freaks out.
Riley tells Trevor about everything that’s happened believing that the Cenobites might be hallucinations but at the same time linked to the puzzle box. Pulling out the puzzle box, she tries to hand it to Trevor but he jumps back in fear.
So Chris Evans-Lite Trevor is apparently the only one who has seen horror movies. Riley is shocked that Trevor actually believes her and the two look into who owned the warehouse where they found it.
A short time later the two arrive at a nursing home and meet with Serena Menaker who tells them the puzzle box wasn’t shipped to the warehouse, it was locked up there. She also reveals that it killed Roland Voight who was obsessed with it and thought the cenobites were angels. As a scared Trevor tries to leave, Riley reveals the box to Serena.
Serena asks Trevor to get her some water and while Riley is distracted, she grabs the box stating she’s going to lock it up. Instead, she appears to move some pieces around and since this box is the only lead to Matt, Riley tries to take it back.
In the struggle, a blade ejects from the box and cuts Serena allowing Riley to take it back. As Trevor enters the room, Serena reveals she did it to herself as she regrets the things she did while working for Voight. Trevor and Serena get in their car and leave, not noticing the puzzle box changing on its own in the back seat.
Meanwhile, inside the nursing home, the walls shift and a cenobite, The Asphyx, walks past her. Serena runs but is eventually surrounded by cenobites. She kneels, apologizes for what she’s done, and begs for mercy.
The Weeper holds her in place as The Gasp pulls a pin from The Weeper’s eye and places it in Serena’s mouth. The Gasp then tells her to save her breath for screaming which is as badass as it is terrifying.
That night Riley does some research and finds out that Roland Voight is only presumed dead as he has been missing for six years. Trevor enters and says that he just got off the phone with the nursing home who informed him Serena is missing. Trevor thinks they should get rid of the puzzle box but Riley suggests they go to Voight’s mansion because she has clearly lost her damn mind.
While Riley is on the phone with Colin, Trevor tries to sneak off with the puzzle box but Riley realizes it’s gone because Trevor’s apartment is not that big. Stopping him on the staircase she takes the puzzle box back and says she can’t trust him.
The following day Riley, on her own, drives to Voight’s mansion, and the driveway gate opens on its own. Ignoring that creepy shit, she drives up to the mansion but finds it completely encased in a metal gate covering all entrances.
Looking around, Riley finds an opening near a window and breaks in. Searching around she finds the display room from the beginning of the movie and the switches that control the gates surrounding the house.
Continuing her search, she finds a room full of Voight’s drawings of the cenobites including a book with all the cheat codes.
Later that night, Riley is still in the mansion reading the book and finds a page showing that the finished puzzle will grant the person an “audience with God”. Riley then hears Matt’s voice calling out to her and she follows it down to the basement where Matt is standing.
She should have been suspicious after she asked if it was really him and he responded with “if you want it to be.” But instead, she hugs him and in a mirror, she sees it’s actually a body with all of its flesh removed.
Riley jumps back and screams causing the body to disappear as Colin, Nora, and Captain America Trevor show up to, presumably, save the day. Trevor tells Riley they’re there to help but mainly bring her home. Riley refuses and Colin asks Nora and Trevor to wait upstairs as he talks with her.
Upstairs, Trevor heads to the bathroom as Nora flips some switches looking for the one that controls the light. As the lights turn on a portion of the wall opens up revealing a hidden room.
Meanwhile, Riley shows Colin everything she found about the puzzle box and we learn that whoever meets with God can make a wish for their deepest desire; life, knowledge, love, sensation, resurrection, or power. Riley thinks she can use the puzzle box to bring Matt back under the wish of resurrection.
Colin is not about that weird, clearly evil, life and tries to convince Riley to just leave. Back with Nora, someone closes the door behind her locking her in the secret hallway. Trevor shows up and is luckily able to hear Nora through the wall, who then instructs him to flip the switch to open the door.
As he looks for the switch, Riley goes to show the puzzle box to Colin but discovers it’s missing. Meanwhile, we see someone in the walls with Nora, solve the puzzle, and stab her in the back with it. Freaking out, she runs down the hall and sees someone in the shadows run towards her, Importantly whoever it is, doesn’t appear to be a cenobite.
Pushing through another hidden wall, she ends up in the display room from the start of the movie, and Colin and Riley rush to her aid. Colin pulls out the puzzle box from her back which is something you should never do when you have something impaled in you.
Trevor rushes over and says they need to call an ambulance but Riley suggests they all just leave and take her to the hospital. As Riley picks up the puzzle box and the group leaves, we see the person in the walls is Voight! DUN DUNN DU-the fuck?
The group rush into Trevor’s van and Nora says she can hear bells, is Vecna from Stranger Things a cenobite? I don’t think we have that answer yet. As the group drive and gets lost, it’s hinted that the cenobites are changing the roads just like they warp reality when they move walls.
In the back of the truck, Nora gets up and finds herself in a stone room. The Masque and The Chatterer walk in causing Nora to run but she stops when The Priest appears at the other end of the hall. Chains emerge and pierce Nora’s body lifting her up in the air, and pulling her closer to The Priest.
Nora starts to pray but The Priest tells her there’s no music in Heaven. I’d like to point out that she refers to the screams of people being tortured as music.
The Priest removes one of the pins in her head and slowly pushes it through Nora’s throat. We get to see it up close so that was… fun. The Chatterer then appears in front of Nora and pulls her body as the chains pull on her skin.
In the real world, Riley looks through the rearview mirror and sees the scene unfolding behind her though no one else can see it. As The Chatterer pulls Nora completely off the chains, it tears all the skin off of her back. A splattering of blood appears in the real world causing Trevor to crash.
With the car out of commission, the group debate on what to do next. Chris Evans-Lite Trevor comes up with a plan to get back to the house where Riley’s car is and admittingly I expected more from Captain America. Colin also thinks it’s a stupid-ass plan and while they argue, Riley grabs the puzzle box and walks off.
Riley runs to a small bridge and is about to throw the box into the river but The Priest shows up. The Priest tries to convince Riley to give them two more sacrifices so she can have her brother back but Riley refuses so The Priest says “fuck it” and triggers the box. A blade pops out, cuts Riley’s hand, and The Priest basically tells her to bring them two more sacrifices or they’ll kill her.
As The Priest disappears and Riley’s vision starts to blur, Trevor and Colin show up and help Riley walk towards the house. Approaching the front gate, The Priest shows up, opens the ground revealing steps, and The Chatterer walks up. This time the entire group can see the Cenobites and they all run towards the front gate except Colin who trips over nothing.
Trevor and Riley climb over the gate and notice Colin is not with them. They yell for Colin to get up and run but he stumbles as The Chatterer approaches. Luckily since Colin is not marked The Chatterer completely ignores him and continues forward toward Riley.
Breaking the gate open, The Chatterer pins Trevor and Riley between the gate and the wall. Unable to reach Riley, The Chatterer goes for Trevor and after a slight struggle is able to bite a chunk of his arm off. Realizing the blade of the puzzle box is still ejected, Riley stabs The Chatterer with it and stops its attack.
The Priest then reluctantly summons her chains, tears into The Chatterer, and pulls him apart, killing him as he is now considered the 5th sacrifice.
Colin runs over to Trevor and Riley alerting them that more Cenobites are coming and they need to run, no shit. The three reach the house as Trevor falls to the ground from loss of blood. Riley rushes to the switch panel and activates the gates around the house, preventing the cenobites from entering as Colin uses Riley’s belt as a tourniquet for Trevor’s arm.
Sometime later Colin and Riley try to figure out what to do and Colin rejects Riley’s plan of leaving her behind. In another room, Trevor is woken up by the sounds of the walls opening and it’s that son of a bitch, Voight.
We see that Voight now has some mechanical parts attached to his chest causing him immense pain. Presumably whatever he asked for from Leviathan, the cenobites’ God, it didn’t go as planned.
We also find out that Trevor has been working for Voight this entire time! Damn it! He was never Avengers Chris Evans, he was Knives Out Chris Evans.
Meanwhile, Riley develops a plan to kill another Cenobite using the puzzle box by opening the gates and letting only one in. Since this would count as the final sacrifice, that would end things and allow Riley to make her wish.
After filling Trevor in on the plan, Trevor is placed in charge of activating the switches. Riley heads outside and sees The Weeper, The Gasp, and The Priest. She eggs them on to take her and eventually they come after her with The Asphyx in the lead. Inside, Trevor activates the switch trapping The Asphyx and Riley approaches it to stab it.
The Asphyx suddenly gets a bolt of energy in a jump scare and chases after Riley causing her to drop the puzzle box. Trevor activates another switch trapping The Asphyx in-between the gates and Colin looks for the puzzle box but it’s now missing.
It’s revealed Voight grabbed the box when he appears and stabs Colin in the stomach much to Trevor’s chagrin. Trevor yells at Voight and Voight reveals to Riley that Trevor has been working for him. Voight then monologues and we learn that he asked Leviathan for sensation as he was searching for pleasure but he didn’t realize that pleasure for cenobites is pain for humans.
The contraption, jammed into his chest, pulls on the nerves in his body causing pain in random cycles and prevents him from becoming numb to it. Voight’s plan was to have Trevor activate the puzzle box, sacrifice six people, and bring it to Voight so he can call upon Leviathan and change his wish.
Voight sets the puzzle box on the pedestal calling upon Leviathan and Trevor opens the gate allowing the cenobites in. Riley yells at Colin to run as Voight instructs Trevor to go after him as the cenobites still need to kill him. Colin runs towards the basement avoiding The Gasp, The Masque, and a cenobite we haven’t seen before The Mother.
As The Priest enters the mansion, Voight triggers the gates trapping The Priest in a hall. This inadvertently also prevents The Gasp from reaching Colin who is now in the basement. Voight approaches The Priest and demands he be made right again, revealing that the gates were also part of a cage he was building to trap the cenobites.
Instead of being angry or showing any real emotion, The Priest appears more impressed with Voight and agrees to address his “displeasure” and that’s a weird way to phrase that. Riley slips between the gate trapping The Asphyx, grabs the puzzle box, runs to the switch panel, and opens the gates before Voight can stop her.
Meanwhile, with the gates now open, The Gasp reaches Colin and calls upon metal wires to wrap around his body lifting him in the air. His screams alert Trevor and Riley who arrive in the basement at the same time. Riley demands The Gasp stop and reminds her that The Priest gave her the power to choose who to sacrifice.
Upstairs Voight tells The Priest he rejects the Leviathan’s gift, wants no part of it, and wishes to die. The Priest rejects the request and says that since he has already chosen a gift, he can’t go back, and can only switch it for another greater gift.
In any other circumstance, an option to exchange a product you’re not happy with for something of equal or GREATER value is unheard of and a pretty sweet deal. The Priest offers Voight the Leviathan configuration which is power and he accepts probably thinking that nothing could be worse.
The mechanical contraption in Voight’s chest falls apart and his body regenerates bringing him extreme joy. Voight laughs but it’s short-lived as a large hook and chain falls from Leviathan and impales him. Voight is then lifted into the air as The Priest says he’ll know their “finest gift.”
Downstairs, Trevor questions what Riley is doing as she points the puzzle box toward him and he reminds her that he tried to stop her. This is true but I feel like he could have been a bit more honest in what he was doing or who he was working for. Riley feels the same way since she stabs Trevor with the puzzle box when he lunges at her.
The wires holding up Colin disappear and latch onto Trevor dragging him down into a bottomless pit. Riley helps Colin head toward the exit of the mansion but they stop when Riley spots the cenobites in the display room.
Colin tells her to go and finish it and she reluctantly agrees. There, The Priest tells Riley to choose her reward but Riley says she doesn’t want anything as she has seen what the cenobites’ “rewards” look like.
The Gasp and The Priest tell her she has chosen the lament configuration, meaning she chooses to live with regret, knowing what she’s done, and everyone she’s hurt and lost. Looking at the box, it’s now back to its original form and when Riley looks up, the cenobites are gone.
Riley places the box on the ground and along with Colin, they leave the mansion.
We cut to Voight completely hairless, in an area of pure light. The film ends as Voight’s skin is flayed open all over his body and pins are inserted into him. Turns out that choosing power turns you into a cenobite.
Review:
Hellraiser is good. It’s well-acted especially Odessa A’zion as Riley later in the film. The movie overall has natural sounding dialogue… well as natural as dialogue talking about inter-dimensional beings can sound. The story makes sense and is pretty easy to follow despite the amount of lore that could have been included in the movie.
I thought the parallels to how addiction affects one’s friends and family would have been more in the forefront of the movie but while it wasn’t as prominent it was still there. Riley’s addiction basically starts all of the troubles and then her addiction to saving Matt creates the rest of the problems. Although trying to save one’s brother feels less like an addiction storyline and more like something anyone would have done.
While the introduction of the main characters suffers a bit from the writer trying to get us to quickly know these characters, resulting in them using tired tropes, it’s not that big of a deal because we know most of these characters will just be victims to the cenobites.
I can’t say enough good things about the designs of the cenobites, Jamie Clayton and Selina Lo as The Priest (AKA Pinhead) and The Gasp respectively were standouts (but they were also the only one’s with lines). The Priest’s stoic demeanor and slight smiles at times were creepy and The Gasp was disturbing to look at and hear.
Yet, as with all movies, there are still some negatives. The movie overall is a bit too dark, if you saw the screenshots above, those were with my computer’s brightness at 100% and I still had to turn the brightness up post-screenshots.
The Cenobites allowing Riley to sacrifice two more instead of The Priest just killing her after activating the puzzle box on the bridge doesn’t make a lot of sense in retrospect. They’ve killed everyone else who’s blood has been absorbed by the box, why not Riley at that moment? Moments later The Chatterer goes after Riley which goes against The Priest letting her live.
Overall I highly recommend Hellraiser currently exclusive to Hulu in the U.S. but if you’re squeamish at gore and can’t watch movies with body horror, you might want to stay away as there is a good amount of it.
Cast IMDB
Stuff to Ignore
Rotten Tomatoes – 69% (nice) at the time of writing
Metacritic – 58 at the time of writing