An Average Movie-Goer’s Review
Spoilers! If you don’t want spoilers – check out the Spoiler-Free post
I love horror movies and if I’m going to watch them anyway, why not write an entertaining/funny review from the POV of an average movie-goer and not a professional critic.
Today we’re looking at the 1978 classic, John Carpenter’s Halloween
An escaped mental patient, Michael Myers, returns home to Haddonfield, Illinois, and stalks Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) on Halloween.
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Is it Scary?
It’s been a few decades since Halloween and it’s been pretty influential for a lot of horror movies since then, because of this you might not be scared by it but it’s still pretty suspenseful. There are a couple of jump scares that may get you but what really makes the suspense is the music, which is not surprising given it’s from John Carpenter.
By the end, you might be a bit scared if you’re a babysitter in a small town and have noticed someone in a white mask watching you but in that case, maybe call the police?
Detailed Plot:
We jump straight into the opening credits which is just a pumpkin on one side of the screen and credits on the other. We cut to Haddonfield, Illinois, on Halloween 1963 in the POV of someone watching a house from across the street.
We move closer and see a couple making out through a window. After the man asks if they’re alone and the woman responds “Michael” is around somewhere, they head upstairs to be teens in a 1970s horror film.
It’s eventually revealed the POV we’re in is Michael’s and the woman is Judith, his sister. I’m stating this now because it will make the next section easier to write and I’ve already seen this movie plenty of times.
Michael enters through the kitchen door, grabs a knife, and proceeds to the living room. I guess the boyfriend is one-pump-chump because it’s been literally 60 seconds and he’s already leaving the house. Michael heads upstairs, puts on a clown mask, and enters Judith’s room where she’s topless brushing her hair.
Judith is shocked that Michael has walked in on her but she’s even more shocked when he starts stabbing her. Michael exits the house as his parents arrive. They take off his mask and stare at him for a really long time as we pan out.
“No no, let me stare at him disapprovingly for another 5 minutes.”
Time jump to 15 years later and we’re now in Smith’s Grove, Illinois on October 30th, 1978. Dr. Loomis and nurse Marion (played by Donald Pleasence and Nancy Stephens) are heading to a mental asylum where Michael has been kept for the last 15 years.
As they drive up we learn from Loomis that Michael hasn’t spoken in 15 years and they are being forced to move him to a new facility. Loomis also seems pretty scared of what Michael is capable of.
Unfortunately for the dynamic duo as they arrive at the asylum, they see a bunch of patients wandering around just outside the gate. Loomis realizes the patients have escaped and leaves the car to phone someone at the booth near the gate. Meanwhile, Michael climbs on top of the car and grabs Marion through the open window.
Able to break free, she shuffles to the other side of the car where she must have forgotten that there’s another window.
Michael hits the window alerting Marion and she jumps out of the car. Michael hops in and drives off. Who the fuck gave him driving lessons?
We cut to the next day AKA Halloween in Haddonfield. We meet our main character teenager Laurie Strode (played by Jamie Lee Curtis) leaving her home as her father, who is a realtor, tells her to drop off the Myer’s house key at the house.
As she walks, Tommy (played by Brian Andrews) runs up to her and we learn that Laurie will be babysitting him later that night. He watches her drop off the key at the Myers house which is revealed to be Michael’s old house and Tommy tells her the house is cursed.
The two don’t see someone watching them from the door. As Laurie walks away singing, Michael walks out and continues watching her as we hear his heavy breathing.
Back at the mental asylum, Loomis is furious at the director(?) and tells him to call the police to warn them that Michael is heading to Haddonfield. He also asks the most important question of who gave Michael driving lessons but we don’t get an answer.
In class, Laurie spots Michael, now in a mask, watching her from across the street. She’s forced to look away when her teacher won’t let her daydream and when she looks back out the window, Michael is gone.
After school, Tommy is leaving carrying a pumpkin when a trio of kids led by one named Lonnie, bullies him by telling him the boogeyman is coming to get him. As he tries to run away, Lonnie trips him causing him to fall and break his pumpkin.
The bullies run off and one is grabbed by Michael but let go because Michael doesn’t kill children… yet. I guess Michael remembers Tommy is the kid that Laurie was watching and decides to stalk him eventually driving off. I also think someone is a bit obsessed with Laurie.
Meanwhile, Laurie leaves school with her friends Linda (played by P.J Soles) and Annie (played by Nancy Kyes) when she realizes she left her chemistry book in school. We also learn Annie will be babysitting a girl named Lindsey a few doors down from where Laurie will be babysitting Tommy.
Annie is also angry that her boyfriend has been grounded because, according to Linda, she only babysits to have a place for sex.
Turning around they see Michael in a car driving by. Linda believes it’s one of their classmates and Annie yells at him for speeding. As they continue walking, Laurie spots Michael watching them from some bushes, not even trying to hide it but disappears before Annie can confront him.
Arriving at home, Laurie goes to her room and sees Michael watching her from behind the clothesline.
At the cemetery, the groundskeeper takes Loomis to Judith’s gravestone only to find it missing. The entire gravestone is gone and the groundskeeper is barely shocked and blames the kids. Never knew kids in the 70s were into robbing 100+ pound pieces of rock but okay.
A couple of hours later Annie picks up Laurie and they drive to the houses they’ll be babysitting at. Before they get there they spot Annie’s dad who happens to be Sheriff Brackett (played by Charles Cypher) outside of a hardware store.
He tells them someone stole a mask, some rope, and some knives but blames it on “some kids” and doesn’t appear to take it seriously. We know it was Michael but even if it was just some kids, feels like the police should take the theft of knives and rope a bit more seriously.
As they drive off, Loomis arrives and asks to speak with Brackett about something important.
Back with the girls continuing their drive, they talk about Laurie’s crush on a guy named Ben Tramer and don’t notice Michael following them in a car… seriously who taught him how to drive?
That night Loomis and Brackett arrive at the Myer house and find a recently killed dog which Loomis implies Michael ate… the fuck? After a jump scare where a piece of the gutter falls and breaks the window in Judith’s old room, the men realize Michael isn’t there. Loomis decides to stay and wait for Michael’s return while Brackett goes to alert his men that a killer is on the loose.
Meanwhile, as Laurie is on the phone with Annie, who is babysitting Lindsey across the street at the Wallace house, Tommy looks out the window and sees Michael staring at the house.
Tommy alerts Laurie but by the time she looks out the window, Michael is gone and is now watching Annie. Annie accidentally spills about a bit of butter on her shirt and she decides to completely undress for some reason. Usually, if I spill something on my shirt, I use a napkin or remove the shirt to dry but not Annie, she takes off her entire wardrobe.
She also decides to run a cycle in the laundry room that is conveniently (for Michael) outside. This is the part where I remind you that she is babysitting in someone else’s house. Was everyone just really cool with babysitters back then?
Outside the house, the family dog has found Michael and starts barking like he’s just seen a murderer. Annie yells for Lindsey to quiet the dog but after she hears it whimper she believes the dog found a ‘hot date’. Unfortunately, it’s a hot date with death as we see Michael kill the dog, or maybe, as Loomis would believe, Michael thought it was a snack.
While Annie starts the washing machine, Michael locks her in the laundry room and… just stares at her. After Annie’s boyfriend calls the house, Lindsey goes out to get Annie and frees her. Annie then invites Paul over for some of that thing that teens aren’t allowed to do in horror movies (the sex) and doesn’t see Michael staring at her from the open door.
Deciding to drive and pick up Paul instead, Annie drops Lindsey off with Laurie because Annie is only here to watch children and have sex and she’s all out of children to watch. Before getting in her car, she doesn’t check the backseat and learns the hard way that people can hide in them.
Michael pops out and strangles her a bit before cutting her throat.
Back at Laurie’s growing babysitting club, Tommy spots Michael carrying Annie’s dead body across the street and into the Wallace house but, as usual, no one sees it and Laurie doesn’t believe him. Back at the Myers house, Loomis is outside by the bushes watching it and spots Lonnie and his gang of prepubescent bullies daring each other to go inside the house.
Lonnie decides to be the brave one and approaches the door. Instead of Loomis popping out of the bushes and telling them there’s a dangerous killer on the loose, he decides to scare them by whispering from the bushes using a creepy voice, demanding they leave.
At the Wallace house, Linda and her boyfriend arrive with plans to have sex in one of the rooms as Annie distracts Lindsey. Since no one locks doors, they enter the house and wonder where the hell Annie is but don’t see Michael watching them from the other room.
Linda calls Laurie who tells her that Annie went to pick up Paul and isn’t back yet. Linda and Bob take this as permission to head upstairs and have sex. After they’re done, Bob goes downstairs to get Linda a beer and is distracted when the back door opens on its own.
Thinking it’s Linda pranking him, he searches the closets but it turns out Michael is the prankster. Michael pops out of a closet, uses one hand to lift Bob in the air, and stabs him into the wall with the other.
Apparently, Michael is a prankster because he puts on a white bedsheet along with Bob’s glasses and enters the room where Linda believes he’s Bob. Not getting a reaction out from the person Linda thinks is Bob, she decides to call Laurie and find out where Annie is.
While on the phone, Michael strangles Linda as Laurie hears the whole thing but believes Linda pranking her. After killing her, Michael breathes into the phone which creeps out Laurie as it should anyone and he hangs up. Laurie calls back but no one picks up which sets off her “maybe it’s not a prank” alarm.
After double-checking that the kids are asleep, she decides to head over to the Wallace house to get some answers. Meanwhile back at the Myers house, Loomis notices the car Michael stole from him the day before a few houses down. Why is Loomis just noticing the car despite him watching the house for hours?
Shhh, don’t worry about it especially since it doesn’t make sense. Michael was driving that car when he followed Laurie and Annie to the Wallace’s, and it’s established that the Myers house is closer to Laurie’s house, not the Wallace’s, so how is the car suddenly back by the Myer’s house?
Laurie enters the Wallace house through the back door and assumes Linda, Bob, and Annie are playing a prank on her since the house is dark and they’re not answering her. Continuing upstairs, she enters the bedroom and finds Annie dead and on display including Judith’s gravestone.
Laurie stumbles back into one of the closets and in a pretty good jump scare, Bob’s lifeless body swings down from the ceiling. Laurie screams and stumbles into a corner of the room where a closet opens on its own and she sees Linda’s body. This brings up an interesting question, can Michael telepathically control doors? That’s like the 5th door that opens on its own in this movie.
Running out of the room, Laurie breaks down near the staircase as we see Michael standing in the dark. He attempts to stab her but since this is the first real overhead stab he’s done all movie, Michael misses and slices at her arm. Laurie jumps back and falls down the stairs injuring her leg.
Michael continues after her but Laurie is able to escape the house just in time. Running to a neighboring house, they turn on their porch light, look out the window, and see a terrified screaming Laurie begging for help. They aren’t dealing with that crazy shit today, so they turn off their porch light and ignore her.
Laurie runs back to Tommy’s house and starts banging on the door. Finally able to get Tommy to wake up by throwing a pot plant at the window. Tommy casually walks downstairs to open the door as we see Michael also casually walking towards Laurie.
Tommy opens the door and Laurie runs in demanding Tommy go upstairs and hide with Lindsey. Laurie attempts to call the police but the phone line has been cut and then realizes that the window is open so Michael is totally already in the house.
Crouching by the couch but not looking behind it, Laurie grabs a large sewing needle and hopes for the best. Michael appears from behind the couch and we learn he has just the absolute worst aim as he tries to stab Laurie but gets the couch instead. Laurie turns and jams the needle into Michael’s neck.
Michael drops to the ground appearing dead and Laurie runs upstairs to check on the kids. Tommy says he’s scared of the boogeyman but Laurie tells him she already killed him. At the exact moment, she says that sentence we see Michael walking up the stairs behind her because he has great comedic timing.
The kids scream and hide in the bathroom as Laurie runs into the bedroom. She opens the balcony doors and contemplates going down but decides to hide in the closet instead. Using a piece of clothing to tie the knobs together she crouches in a corner as Micheal walks into the room.
He breaks through the closet slats, knocking down some wire hangers but still can’t reach Laurie. Grabbing one of the hangers, Laurie unwinds it and stabs Michael in the eye with it
Michael drops his knife as he pulls out the hanger and Laurie grabs it, using it to stab Michael in the side. Michael falls back to the ground and since the rules of double-tap haven’t been established in horror, Laurie just walks around him.
Calling out to Tommy and Lindsey, she tells them to run outside to a neighbor’s and call the cops. Running outside they run past Loomis while screaming like maniacs. Meanwhile inside, Laurie doesn’t see Michael getting up behind her.
Michael attacks Laurie and starts choking her as Loomis runs up the stairs with his gun drawn. Laurie is able to distract Michael by pulling off his mask and we get a quick face reveal. Meanwhile, spotting Michael, Loomis pulls a Frank Reynolds and just starts blasting.
Michael falls back into the room and Loomis keeps firing hitting Michael multiple times causing him to fall from the second-story balcony. Laurie asks Loomis if that was the boogeyman and he confirms it was. The film ends as Loomis looks down from the balcony and discovers Michael is gone.
Review:
Halloween is good, some might consider it great and I would agree if this was 1978 and Halloween hadn’t influenced the slasher genre. Sure, Halloween is great and one of the best slasher horror movies for what it’s done, but watching it in 2022 and seeing it as an average movie-goer, it’s just good.
The acting is good, and the dialogue feels very 70s teenager but honestly, if you add in some references to social media, it even passes for dialogue that would be seen in some movies today. Michael Myers is great, you learn absolutely nothing about him besides the opening making him essentially just a killing machine with no wants and this elevates the horror.
The best part of Halloween is the use of the music, it adds suspense that elevates almost every scene to the point where the scenes where you don’t hear music, you feel uneasy.
There are very few negatives and most of them are mainly because this is a movie from the 70s. My main “complaint” is the lingering shots, there are so many! In different parts of the movie, we watch Laurie just walking for almost a minute, one of these scenes is before Michael is after her so there’s no horror or suspense. The other times though, the music helpfully adds suspense and since we know Michael likes to watch from afar, it’s less boring.
The only other negative I have is the lack of Loomis in this movie, feels like they didn’t know what to do with him for most of the movie so he becomes a security guard to an abandoned house until it’s time for the climax. Not a big deal because the other stuff happening is interesting but just feels like a bit of a waste.
In the end, I highly recommend Halloween, not just because it’s an influential movie in horror but also because almost 45 years later, while it’s not as scary, it’s pretty suspenseful.
Related Article: Halloween (2018) Explained
Cast IMDB